Monday, December 16, 2013

What Love Is This....

This weekend, my family had the honor of sharing our testimony for Advent during our church's worship service.  When Maggie, our children's ministry director, first asked me if we would - I may have teared up a little...or a lot.  Being able to share about our adoption journey and glorify God and all that He has done just about makes my heart explode with joy.  Our family stood together in front of the church and this is what we said...

In January of this year our family started the journey of adoption.  It’s a journey that will lead us to a little boy in Colombia, South America….you might’ve heard of it J

It has been a long year full of home study interviews and paperwork.  Our family has been so blessed by all of the encouragement we have received from our family, church, and friends.  Watching God provide close to $15,000 to our family in less than 6 months was nothing short of miraculous. We continually stand in awe of all that He has done not only for us, but in us this past year.

We are now in the agonizing part of this journey where all we can do is wait – we wait for approval from Colombia and then we wait to find out just exactly who our son is.

About 2 months ago, we thought the wait was over.  Our social worker presented us with the file and picture of a precious 2 ½ year old little boy.  Almost immediately – we said ‘Yes! We want to be his mommy and daddy.”  We believed we had found our son and it was so sweet to look into his eyes.  We promised him love and a family – two things he had not had in his short little life.

A few days later, we found out that we would not be able to adopt this sweet boy.  There had been miscommunication between the Colombian government and our adoption agency.  Our family rejoices for this sweet boy – he couldn’t be ours because he was already being adopted by another family.

But our hearts were broken…crushed under a weight of grief that we could not explain.  We had been told to guard our hearts and not fall in love too quickly, but you can’t commit to being child’s mommy and daddy without loving them with the full force that comes from a parent’s heart.

But even in the midst of that experience and knowing that it could happen again, we have felt peace.

-    A peace that surpasses all understanding.
-    A peace that tells us to stay with God, to remember who He is, 
to trust in His plan, to know what He is for
-         A peace that comforts our broken hearts
-        A peace that we ask God to surround our son with at this very moment
It is the peace that came to this earth on the night Jesus was born.

Luke 2:11-14
“Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord.  This will be a sign to you: You will find the baby wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a manger. Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying. “Glory to God in the highest and on earth, peace and good will toward men.”

Even though Jacob and I were both terrified to be up there, speaking into a microphone, it was very special for us and our children...who wanted to know why they didn't get a turn to talk in the microphone =)

But then the most special part happened....

After the service, a beautiful young woman came up to me and called me by name.  She said she wanted to briefly tell me her story.  She said her mother brought her home from Honduras 31 years ago.  She said she was not the first, second, or third child her mother had tried to bring home.  She said her mother's heart was broken and her journey was tough - but she knew that God had ordained her mother to be her mommy.  She encouraged me in that God knows who our son is and that He has the big and perfect plan, no matter how painful it is.  She said her song for her mother is "What Love Is This"...which is one of my all time favorites.  

What love is this, that you gave your life for me
And made a way for me to know you
And I confess you're always enough for me you're all I need

This song is written about the love Christ has for us in that He laid down his life to make a way for us to be in a relationship with Him.  She said, "You know...my mom did that.  She laid her heart down for me over and over again so that I could be hers.  Hang in there, you will get to the son God has chosen for you."

I couldn't thank her enough for her encouragement and for sharing her beautiful story with me.  

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